Silver and Mourning Weddings

Because Jehovah called you as a forsaken and sorrowful woman in spirit, and as a wife of youth who is rejected, said your God. Isaiah 54:6

It was a silver wedding anniversary. Twenty-five years of a blissful married life. A quarter of a century living together, united, bound by strong bonds of love, companionship, and faithfulness. Neil and Brenda Janson from Hayes, England, wanted to celebrate their silver wedding anniversary in the same chapel where they had gotten married twenty-five years ago, in front of the same clergyman and witnesses. But when Neil, the husband, repeated the Pastor's words and thus renewed his vows of eternal love, something happened that bewildered everyone. At that moment, he suffered a heart attack that ended his life. He died while holding his wife's hand. Friends and relatives dubbed the occasion "silver wedding and mourning."

One wonders: Why does a man still young have to die precisely on the day he celebrates twenty-five years of marriage? Twenty-five years of marriage lived in love, faithfulness, and companionship are a tremendous blessing, and to end one's life there, having enjoyed a happy marriage, is a failure in the sense that it is both a tragic event and an adverse outcome.

However, a thousand times more failure than a heart attack is the destruction of a home, regardless of the length of time it has endured. We consider it divine injustice that a marriage that was going well, with no fights and filled with peace, experienced a sudden forced separation. Nevertheless, that is not failure. Failure is not considering the sacredness of vows. Failure is lacking patience in marriage. Failure is being irreverent and disrespectful to one's spouse. Failure is cutting off communication and closing the door of the heart. Failure is being unfaithful, cheating on one's spouse, committing adultery, thus disregarding the vows of honor and mutual fidelity. That is failure.

The quality of our life is not determined by the years. Happiness, peace, and success in marriage are the result of mutual surrender, reciprocal submission, sacrifice, and love. These virtues do not respond to fleeting emotions but to a decision: to consider our vows sacred and to wholeheartedly love the person God has given us until death do us part.

With Christ in our lives and in our marriage, we can have that prize. Let us make Him our owner and Lord. He will not only give our marriage many years of endurance but also strong feelings of love.